you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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