We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize