is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
