yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Randomize
