love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Liz is crying about burritos again.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Randomize