He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Randomize
