I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
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