i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
