Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Randomize
