i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
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