I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
