so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize