Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
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