I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize