The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
Randomize
