And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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