would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Randomize