So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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