I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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