just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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