Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
