ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
