I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
