you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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