this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
