Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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