last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
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