he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
