dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
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