some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize