I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
