Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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