I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
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