HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Randomize
