soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
He? As in you personified your dick?
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
