winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Text me some of your sweat
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
