I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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