Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
Randomize