And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Randomize
