Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize
