dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
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