did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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