Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
