I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
