I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
