i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
no. you can't hotbox the world.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Never let your siblings swipe right.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
