Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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