where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
