Dual....:-)
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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