Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
Randomize
