Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Randomize
