I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize